Toddler, Curly Hair Care Advice Needed Desperately

Updated on October 24, 2008
B.B. asks from El Paso, TX
40 answers

Hi I am in desperate need of some advice. My daughter is half black and half mexican. Her hair is beautiful but I just dont know how to tame it. She has really curly hair but it is soft. I have tried just for me hair products which I love the shampoo and conditioner, I have also tried this shampoo and conditioner I bought online called its a curl and it works ok but the smell of it is strong. The smell is not stinky its just smells like a strong perfume. So basically I need help and dont know what to do. Anyone have any suggestions?

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D.M.

answers from Houston on

I used to baby sit a little girl who was half black, half hispanic, and johnson and johnson pink baby lotion is the best thing in the world. might sound crazy but try it!! :)

D. Mattern-Muck
Mom's helping mom's work from home!
http://www.formyrugrats.com

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S.O.

answers from San Antonio on

Same exact problem. I've tried a lot. I now use Paul Mitchell's Leave In Conditioner. After shampoo/conditioner, while wet, we put it in and then comb through. In the mornings, we just spritz it with a water bottle just enough to make it not look like bedhead, maybe comb the ends only. She's good to go. I never brush her hair fully, I use a widetooth comb; and never brush/comb her hair when dry. It has worked quite well with us.

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E.W.

answers from Killeen on

There is a website you can go to: www.carolsdaughter.com They have a lot of natural products. It may cost a little more but a little goes a long way with these products. I would recommend the hair milk, and mimosa hair honey (love the smell). I absolutely love their products I use them on my daughter. Their products are popular so don't be suprised if they are sold out from time to time. Just get it on backorder. But I really think you would be pleased. They also have different packages where you can have a little of everything to try. And there is a conditioner called the Tui hair smoothie. The items I named are really good for curls though. I'm black and wear my hair natural. But I have a really tight curl and these products make it so easy for me. I really hope this helps.

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T.S.

answers from San Antonio on

Hi, I am bi-racial and have beautiful curly hair. I do wash my hair every day, sometimes twice a day. The key is lots of conditioner. Do let it sit on the hair (while in the bath) for as long as possible. I also use a leave in conditioner. I do use an expensive line, but it is all natural - called Purology. However, I grew up on inexpensive products. I actually have not used the "curly" products, but I have found success with the Dry or Damaged hair ones because of the higher concentrations of moisturizers. Also, as a styling product I did like Dep. Since, all curly hair is very different, you just have to play around with different products to see what will work for her. Hope this helps.

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B.B.

answers from Houston on

I have a 13 year old biracial girl and the best thing for her hair (before she got it chemically straightened, not my idea) was Motions. Her younger brother (2 years) has slightly different texture of hair but I still use motions on his too. My DD's hair was so curly and out of control that as a lil girl we always had it in braids or plaits. I guess that's why she wanted it straight once she got old enough to make that decision. Condition and comb when wet. That was the only way I could do her hair.

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V.O.

answers from Austin on

I use KeraCare and LOVE IT!!!! I use the shampoo, conditioner and then use the leave-in conditioner when we're done. Her curls are beautiful:)

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H.M.

answers from Houston on

Hi B.! I have a 3 year old son with beautiful curly hair as well. It is very hard to tame and keep under control without shaving it all off. We have tried tons of detanglers as well as different hair products. These are the things that I have found work well for him and we continue to use them. First of all, I use all the California Baby haircare products, they have shampoo/bodywash, conditioner and a great spray detangler (I have a hard time finding the detangler at times, and all their products are a bit more expensive, but well worth it). Then after we have washed and combed through, sometimes leaving in the conditioner, I apply PINK, it's in the ethnic section of the haircare products. It works great at keeping the curls and helps keep the hair from drying out and becoming brittle. I hope this helps!

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C.H.

answers from Houston on

I am a black mom of a half back/half white girl with curly hair. the most important thing about black hair is dryness. if this is your problem, invest in b and b super grow hair grease (light). use comb out conditioner like stay soft fro when needed. comb the hair out and braid the hair everynight when it gets long. you will have less problems in the morning when you get up. all else fail, find a nice black hairdresser who specializes in children's hair.

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P.M.

answers from Houston on

Hi B.!
My 2 1/2 yr old son is also mixed. I tried so many different products it's pathetic. Anytime I would see a mom with a child with the same type of hair, I would ask what they used. There is a Motions hair lotion that I really liked. You can purchase it at Walmart and it is in a purple bottle. Even so, my son did not like having his hair combed in the morning. (I use a wide tooth comb). One day I was out of the Motions lotion and I just had to put SOMETHING in his hair. Only thing was my biosilk. OMG that thing did wonders. He did not even cry when I ran the comb through his hair (make sure you apply it on damp hair). When I ran out, my husband went out and bought a big bottle! I now have a 6 month old baby that will probably have the same hair.... now I know what to use!

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K.K.

answers from San Antonio on

I don't have the curly hair problem but I did notice at Sharky's hair salon for kids that there are a lot of products to choose from. The staff is quite helpful helping to find something and all the scents are very kid friendly.

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C.L.

answers from San Antonio on

I have always had curly hair and WISH my daughter had it to. I use pantene for curls (because curly hair dries out it needs even more moisture rich products then the ones for dry hair!) and make sure I shampoo right away (do not detangle at this point) then ALWAYS use conditioner. Put the conditioner on as early on during bath as you can and leave it in as long as she will permit. Only detangle after it's been on for at least two minutes or you could be causing breakage without realizing it. After bath, towel dry and use the Fructis gel lotion for curly hair. This is so different then any other reasonably priced product out there because you can let it dry naturally or with a diffuser, and it's so light it won't make her hair sticky or hard or clumpy. By the way, I read curly girl during college and tried the only washing once a week thing and the conditioner build-up itches! If you try that make sure you pay attention to see if it's bothering her and she doesn't know how to express it. Good luck!

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J.M.

answers from Austin on

http://www.devaconcepts.com/ This website addresses all the issues with curly hair. The products don't have any harsh chemicals and have really changed the way my hair curls. One of the keys for curly hair is to use a shampoo that doesn't lather. The ingredients that make shampoo lather are chemicals that are very harsh on curly hair. The other thing is that you should never brush curly hair. When the shampoo and conditioner are in the hair you just use your fingers to get the tangles out. Hope this helps!

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C.B.

answers from Austin on

My son has really thick hair and it tends to have a life of it's own. I use my Biosilk Sil Therapy Cure. It's a very light oil that tames even the craziest of hair. You don't need alot and it is pretty fuss free. I usually apply when he gets out of the shower when his hair is still damp. Good luck. Don't forget that humidity is your enemy. CB

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T.W.

answers from Houston on

There is a product called Deva Curl (http://www.devaconcepts.com/products/curl/DevaCurl_NoPoo) that is AWSOME! It has tamed and moisturized me and my DD's very curly hair. My nephew is also mixed w/ AA & Mexican and it does wonders for his hair! Try it, you wont regret it. They have it at Ulta. Also, remeber that moisture is VERY important.

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K.N.

answers from Beaumont on

I have the same type of hair and the best advice I can give you is to try Tresemme Smooth hair gel (mild smell, not sticky) and never blow it dry or brush it when it is dry. It needs to be finger fluffed/scrunched and left to air dry. You will be amazed at the results.

Remember - curly hair like your daughters works best air dried, finger styled, and NEVER brushed while dry.

Another idea, along with the above, try parting it in the middle or on top. Separate each side into 2 sections (just the front of her head) and twist each one and hold it like a barrette with a small claw style clip. Repeat for the second section on that side then repeat with 2 more clips on the other side. It's a cute style that will get it out of her face but still let it hang long.

Good luck.

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A.E.

answers from College Station on

Oh My gosh!!!! Excuse me for being so excited, but I am half Nigerian and Half Mexican and I NEVER come across other people with a similar mix :) I am the oldest of six siblings and 5 of us are girls! So if you need advice on hair care...I can help you. We all have different levels of curly hair and they each require different products and styling techniques. PLEASE send me a private message so we can exchange email and then we can swap photos of hair and I can help you from there. I'm 25 and have done everything from relaxers, perms, braids to au natural (how i have it now) with my hair so I have tons of advice to share! I'm so sorry that the end of my message happens to rhyme lol, that was not intentional :)

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R.W.

answers from San Antonio on

That sounds exactly like my son. Personally, I love the Curls fragrance - it's not from perfume, but from the oils in the product. However, it definitely can be kind of strong.

Otherwise, my advice is: NEVER wash her hair. My son has gone two weeks without washing his hair, and he just really and truly doesn't need it because his hair is so dry. On the rare occasions when he takes a bath, I just use a conditioner. No shampoo.

Also, and very important: APPLY OIL EVERY DAY. This is the main Curls product we use, but you can in fact use any oil at all, even olive oil or coconut oil. If you don't want any fragrance I recommend jojoba oil, which is very much like our natural skin and hair oil. It absorbs easily and has no frangrance.

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G.B.

answers from Houston on

I have biracial kids. I noticed a big difference when I stopped shampooing her hair. Now I only "wash" her hair with conditioner. Also, I use coconut oil on her hair to tame it. It isn't as sticky and oily as you would think and really makes defined, beautiful curls.

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S.A.

answers from Houston on

have you tried asking his family for advice on haircare for black hair if you are not familiar? Or if you are not comfortable, any black hair stylist would be glad to recommend items to use as they are used to working with all kinds of hair. My thinking is that most of the black hair care products may be too oily for her hair and weigh it down, but they may be able to recommend something to tame the curls for you. Also look on the kinkycurly.com website, their products are great. Carol's daughter products are great too. I found them at Macy's and certain Sephora store in Houston, but you have to be careful with some of their items because they may be too greasy for her hair.

1 mom found this helpful

J.B.

answers from Houston on

I hear you girl! My son is white and black and has awesome curly hair but it gets sooooo dry!! Anyway, I have used the Just for me also and even pink lotion for adults. Of course I have a boy so his hair is short which makes it easier to deal with. But I am kind of like another poster on the hair washing. Now my son has a total mix his hair is curly but it is not as coarse as his dad's and then not as fine as mine,so I what I do is wash it about 2 times per week. That has made a big difference. It looks better and his curls are so cute! Best wishes and if you do find a miracle product, please email me! :)

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M.P.

answers from Houston on

Yea I have two daughters who have curly hairs. One is very curly and dry and other is soft and curly due to their parents (husband and I have curly hairs)

For soft curly- I use either Johnson care 2 n 1 for curly only (green one) then I put little gel after shower. I use the brush first then comb. Let it dry till u put a pony tail before bed or else

For Dry and very curly- I use Olive Oil Shampoo then I put Olive Oil Hair Lotion after shower. You can find them at Sally's Product store. I use the brush first then comb. Let it dry till u put a pony tail before bed or else

They looks great with these shampoos!! Good luck!!:)

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C.M.

answers from Houston on

We're all moptops in this family. Our boys are also mixed heritage with soft curls. For them I use a shampoo/conditioner combo and follow that up with a leave-in conditioner like No More Tangles or HEBs house brand (on the kid's aisle). If their hair flattens out overnight, I just use a little of the detangler and a wide-tooth comb to fluff up and even out their hair in the morning. I don't really wash their hair more than once a week unless it's smelly. Curly hair dries out very easily. Try not to use a blow dryer - it is horrible for curly hair. If possible, try to find a children's shampoo that does not contain sodium laurel sulfate. It's a known skin irritant and is only added to products so they'll lather more.

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A.G.

answers from Austin on

Hi B. - This post on my blog http://www.entrepremusings.com/index.php/2008/03/25/5-tip... might be helpful. It was written by one of the founder of NaturallyCurly.com. They are based in Austin.

Good luck!

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K.C.

answers from Houston on

Hi. I am black and my husband is Hatian so, my daughter currently has really curly soft hair. In addition I have my hair natural (no perm or relaxer). The key is moisture!!!!

I like Miss Jessie's hair care products; they have a baby buttercream that keeps my daughters hair soft, shiny, and manageable; plus it smells great!!!

http://www.missjessies.com/products.htm

Good Luck!!!

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A.W.

answers from Austin on

There's a really great book called Curly Girl http://www.amazon.com/Curly-Girl-Lorraine-Massey/dp/07611... your public library may also have it for you to check out.

Keep her hair long and cut with long layers. Wash her hair at night so it can dry naturally. If you need to blow dry her hair, then use a diffuser. Also, do not shampoo her hair everyday, only about once every 10 days. While in the bath, use a wide tooth comb to help get conditioner through her hair. Once out of the bath, DO NOT use a hairbrush on her hair unless you're braiding or styling straight. Curly hair will frizz when brushed because you're separating the curl.

Curly hair has a mind of it's own and doesn't really follow the same rules as wavy or straight hair. Have patience and enjoy the curl!

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J.L.

answers from Austin on

This is one of those things I've kept tucked away. Another MOM in Tulsa has developed some products for hair like you describe. Check out her website at: http://www.moptophair.com/ sounds like what you might be looking for! :)

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C.M.

answers from Houston on

I have pretty curly hair and I am seeing that my 13 month old will have the same. For shampoo and conditioner I use everyday stuff you can get at any store that is for curly hair. As for styling products, I purchase a moose from Treseme (sp?) that is for curly hair. I have used this for years and have never had issues with my hair drying out. Now, I do wash my hair every night or else the product will dry your hair out but it lasts all day and I never spend more than 5 minutes on my hair from the time I get it wet to the time I'm walking away. I do not own a blow dryer as the heat damages your hair. I do brush my hair every morning after I get it wet and every evening after my shower. I never brush it when it is dry and I always use a brush that has bristles spread apart vs. close together.

As for my daughter I usually just put water on her hair in the morning and she's curly until she's napping and flatenes her hair. I would suggest a little moose in the morning, a bath in the evening to clean up from the day, and just let it air dry.

Best of luck and enjoy!

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J.T.

answers from Victoria on

I am white but people have asked me if I was mexican due to my hair. Its THICK wavy and curly in humidity. I dont have any black in my blood so my hair isnt that curly texture. I do use BioSilk or BioInfusion soothing serum. ( a little too much makes it oily )I usually flat iron my hair or use curlers. I understand that black women have very dry hair and have problems with it being brittle at times. I would ask other black women, that have really nice hair thats not extentions, what they use in there hair. Also asking a salon, or beauty supply store. Assuming her hair is more the black womens texture as aposed to mexican. If anything I knew a girl from highschool that braided her hair in very thin sections and it moved and flowed like hair with out braids and was so pretty.I think she washed her hair with the braids in. I would get it done. Good luck hope you find her answer.

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K.H.

answers from Houston on

I have very curly hair as well and my 14 month old daughter's hair has begun to curl a lot! I bought Johnson's shampoo and conditioner in one for curly hair and it works great for us. Since I wash her hair at night, I just wet it in the morning and put a little mousse in it. I use professional products on my hair (Redken), but I buy mousse at wal-mart for her since she doesn't have much hair yet. I have also used a spray gel on her, but the mousse helps to keep her curls pretty all day. Another curly hair tip is: don't use a brush! I comb my hair when it is wet and then put product in it. Also, a diffuser works wonders, but curly hair is less frizzy if you don't dry it all the way and let it air dry some. I don't wash my hair every day either because it tends to dry it out and cause more frizziness. To re-do it the next day I either pull it half back or dampen it and apply a little more product to shape it. Good luck!! I have always enjoyed my hair because someone took the time when I was a little girl to show me how to care for my curls.

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L.V.

answers from Victoria on

Hi B.,
I have one daughter who has extremely curly hair and like you needed a solution. Her hair tends to be on the dry side and a little coarse. I have tried things from a beauty supply store, but the thing we like the most is dove shampoo and conditioner. We have used Potion 9 which we liked okay however we still like dove better. Hope this helps.
L.

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B.D.

answers from Austin on

I use expensive salon hydrating shampoos and conditioners, because curly hair dries out and breaks easily. But that's your choice.
However, wash the hair only once every two or three days. Also, find some products like leave-in conditioner and anti-frizz serums and LIGHT gels to tame the frizz and keep the hair cuticle curly and shiny. You can use a hairdrier, but it needs to be on low heat and used with a diffuser attachment.

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T.L.

answers from Austin on

Hi
I have a nephew that is half black and half mexican.I also have another nephew who has extremly curly hair.
I found a product at Sallys its called Proclaim it works AWESOME.I recommended it to my nephews and they LOVE it.Its a product that tames frizz w no build up.Its consentrated and using very little goes a LOOONG ways. It feels real light weight and its PERFECT for curly hair and even better its only $5.99. It also doesn't have a scent to it.This is a must try product!!!

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S.B.

answers from Killeen on

Yea, my son has the coursest hair I've ever seen..He's indiann, mexican, and white..While his hair isn't kinky and wild it IS super dry and almost looks like "black" hair before I got the shampoo I use for him now. I would like to recommend Johnson's no more tears, 2 N 1 and it smells pretty nice. Since I've used it I've even gotten comments on how shiny his hair is. It's in the baby shampoo section at walmart..by the diapers and all that. If that doesn't work I would try to get some real leave in conditioner for her. Bed Head is a good brand. I think you can get it at wal mart too. Good luck with your wild headed child. :)

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A.J.

answers from Killeen on

I would try using just a small amount of frizz control spray and then use a wide-tooth comb to brush it while it's still wet, then let it dry naturally. If it's still too frizzy, use a dab of styling gel to hold the curls

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L.B.

answers from Corpus Christi on

baby shampoo is good not a strong smell and should work for fine hair.

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M.P.

answers from Austin on

I agree with the people who say not to brush or comb it when dry. I didn't know I had curly hair until I stopped brushing it dry. My hair is probably not as curly as hers but I don't even use much product, I just quit brushing it dry. Have fun with your curly girl!

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S.T.

answers from San Antonio on

I and my daughter have crazy curly hair. I use baby shampoo on her, but at the same time as shampooing I put in a huge dollop of Pantene conditioner for dry hair. Then rinse, and brush out with a big board brush when wet. In the mornings I spray her hair with water and use a small dollop of conditioner or even a tiny bit of baby oil and brush out the knots and make ringlets with the board brush. Good luck!

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S.C.

answers from Houston on

Hello,

I am not mixed but I have mixed nieces and nephews. Like you mentioned the Just for me products work great, You can also try the pink hair lotion its a littly oily but it keeps there hair from drying out and also helps with taming the curls. Its a lighter form of grease. There is also a product out there called Curly Q, which is designed for biracial children

I hope that helps

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K.B.

answers from Houston on

I have really curly hair and it has always been hard for my parents to tame. As I got older I started straightening it. But when I want to leave my hair curly I use ethnic products such as Ultra Sheen that looks like Vaseline. After wetting my hair I put a good amount in my hair then I slick my hair back in a pony tail and let it dry. When I take my pony tail down the top is flat and the bottom is curly with little or no frizz. Ultra Sheen helps keep my hair conditioned and shiny. I would give it a try. I have used soooo many products and just love this one. I take it with me to the beach after I shower off to tame the frizz. You can find it in the ethnic hair products. I am mixed with Scottish, Native American and Spanish. And it works just fine with my hair. Just remember it looks like Vaseline but in a different colors such as either green or blue. Just use a little, not so much or the hair will be too oily. This should work. Good Luck!

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L.B.

answers from El Paso on

Hi, I have a daughter who had super curly but soft hair too. The biggest thing, when she gets it cut, is to make sure the stylist can cut curly hair, so it "falls" not sits around her ears.My daughter's hair was cut wrong a lot so she looked like Bozo with her hair concentrated around her ears. The other thing I did was use product to help with the frizzies. Her hair is super fine and this seemed to help maintain the curl and to help it from looking "fuzzy" as she calls it when she is playing or touches it alot.
Hope this helps.
L.

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