Mother Seeking as Much Advice as Possible

Kishia, First let me congratulate you on your news. It is a wonderful privelege to be a mother. My fraternal twins (boy/girl) are now 16. They were numbers 4 and 5 out of 6. The oldest child at the time had just turned 6 years old. It was a bit chaotic at our house for a few years, but looking back I treasure those memories. Luckily I had the good sense to video tape a lot of what the kids did and how they played, because honestly those years were a blurr if going from pure memory.

So the advice that I would like to give you would be to prepare yourself and your house for the year to come. The most important thing that I can tell you is that it won't be perfect. Things will not get "done", but that's ok.

I remember freezing lots of food and storing it in small containers so that my oldest daughters could reach it and pop it in the microwave if needed. My mom came over and helped me make a bunch of biscuit and sausage and ham sandwhiches and freeze them in little bags with 2 or 4 in each bag. That gave the kids something quick to eat that wasn't always cereal. I just got it out the night before and let it thaw in the frig. It was also good for the adults as well. Spaghetti, veggie soup, and chicken strips freeze well also. I taught my 6 and 5 year olds of how to do simple things like setting the table, folding towels, and washing dishes. I put as many of the dishes and easy to make foods within reach of the kids (in the floor level shelves) so they didn't have to climb up to get them. Of course I had paper goods on hand for those days that it seemd nothing was getting done. But I did try to limit the use of disposables as much as possible.

As far as your 6 year old ... involving the older sibling in the care of the child is a wonderful thing as long as you don't overdo it. Have some talks with your child about what he/she can do to help. Let him practice putting on a diaper, carrying the baby, rubbing mommy's shoulders.... You can also come up with some "I'm bored" type of things to do while you are busy with the babies and he will be left on his own for entertainment. We sat down and wrote it all out on a big poster board and the kids colored and decorated it. We then displayed it in our living room which is where we always seemed to be. When the kids would come to me with requests or whining I often directed them to the "I'm bored board". It really worked well. We went shopping together for supplies and got the areas set up so that the kids could handle it themselves for those times when I was just too frazzled or too busy to play with them. ( we had a tape recorder and books on tape, pretty paper and funny scissors, markers, crayons, coloring books, my husband made them a babie doll house.... you get the picture.) The point was I wanted them to feel like I hadn't forgotten about them even if I couldn't always be focused on them.

My children are very independent, well mannered and mature kids. they love each other and spend a lot of time together. They share many of the same friends and interests. I know I ddidn't do everything right, but those hectic years and "hard times" were worth it. I promise.

Good luck and God Bless you and your family.

.

Hi K. my name is S. and I am a 28 year old mother of 16 month old triplets, a 4 year old and 7 year old. I have been married for 6 years to a marine but we have been together for 15. You should check with your doctor about the resources in your area. I think that you should be getting as much rest as possible because if you do to much you can go in to early labor. But I can tell you from experience you really want get much help from anyone just advice. My kids are enrolled in the Gerber program and the only thing they send is coupons.

I have 9 mo. twin boys. The best and most useful item I have found is a double snap and go (snap-n-go?) stroller. It allows you to snap both babies into the stroller without taking them out of the carseats. Plus it doesn't weigh very much because it's only the frame. FANTASTIC!!! I'm still using it everytime we go out. It is long, but it fits thru doorways and what not. Good Luck. If you want to talk twins, just let me know!
Cory
Oh yeah, I got mine secondhand for 35$, so take advantage of the Mother of Multiples clubs in your area!!!!

Hi K.,
I have identical girls age 4 and a nine yr old son. We survived by keeping charts. If one had a wet diaper we put a mark under wet-dirty diapers the same thing. This way if something went wrong or one was sick we could look back and say well, she hasn't had a dirty diaper today etc...We made the charts for bottles-oz taken in It was also great when they were sick and you could keep track of meds etc...The main key to survival with twins****when one wakes up, wake the other up, when one needs changed, check the other***I know that may sound crazy, but it keeps you from being up all night. I would feed and change one, and go right into it with the next one. As I became more comfortable with them, I would feed them at the same time using a Boppy billow made for twins. Believe me there is a reason to wake a sleeping baby. Remember with multiples scheduling is everything.I did this,and I'm not a chart making person! You'll do fine! Also, join TMOTT-they are a great source of info and help. It will be totally different than one baby, but atleast you've had the basics and know what to do! It will be busy for the first 3 months, and by six months it will be much easier and you can look back and say "Wow, I made it." Congratulations and best wishes-j

hi K., I'm an almost 27 year old mother of 1 year old fraternal twins and I have a 7 year old boy so I know all about what your getting ready to go through, do you live in Louisville? If so, start by joining the Louisville mother of twins club. The first few weeks are rough, the first few months are crazy, just remember it will get better. After a year now it's easy enough that I'm starting a small home daycare! You just have to get used to it, the hard part is not sleeping. Just make sure your marriage is in good shape, twins will test every part of your relationship, try to arrange for help during the first few weeks especially if you end up with a c-section and be prepared for an early arrival. Do you know the sexes yet? There's so much I can tell you and I'll be happy to guide you through everything I've learned. Thankfully your young, you'll need energy for sure. It's so much fun now that they're a little older! email me if you wan to talk more, ____@____.com

I'm not sure if my advice will be helpful. I do not have twins. But if you are looking for supplies (everything from cribs to car seats to clothes) check Craigslist.com. They have a section for people giving stuff away as well as people who are looking to sell some stuff. They have a whole baby category. Also consignment shops and Goodwill (you have to search through stuff but you can find stuff in really good condition). Also I know that the last couple of years the Moms of Multiples club or organization or whatever it is has done a yard sale at the little mall by Carowinds. I would just check the paper for that or try to find their website and see if they are having another one. You can find all kinds of stuff there for multiples. Good luck and CONGRATS!

I entered the zip code for Garner, NC in the search feature at nomotc.org. Check this:

http://www.nomotc.org/index.php?option=com_clubsearch&amp...

I have a friend who has small twins who belongs to POTATO (parents of twins and triplets org) in our area.

I have 10 month old twins....I could say many things,,,but don't want to scare you. Be ready to have them early(I went into labor 5 times). Take as much help as you are offered it may save your life.
Lastly good luck and i wish you the very best

Hi K.,
Congratulations on your pregnancy!

Area doula information http://www.capefearareadoulas.org/

Henci Goer's Book is an excellent resource. http://www.hencigoer.com/betterbirth/

Ina May's Guide to Childbirth. http://inamay.com/archive/

http://www.birthingfromwithin.com/

Information for a healthy pregnancy diet. http://www.blueribbonbaby.org/

http://www.thebusinessofbeingborn.com/

Peace,
J.

Congratulations! You are smart to look for resources now. Thankfully you have another child, so you kind of know what is ahead of you. I have a 5-year old, 2-year old and 8-month identical twin boys (that were in separate sacs with placentas and they always thought they were fraternal, but a DNA test showed identical).

I would find a good medical facility mainly because you have a risk of preterm labor just for the fact you care carrying twins. A hosptial with a good NICU is important. Your twins may (or may not) spend some time their since they can come early.

I went into preterm labout at 26 weeks. I was huge! I was put on bedrest at the University of North Carolina in Chapel Hill. The doctors were able to delay my labour until 29 weeks 2 days. They were 3lbs 3oz and 3lbs 4oz. They had a lot of trouble with their lungs and were in the NICU at UNC for 8 weeks. The doctors and nurses are amazing. I feel they saved my boys lives. I also hear wonderful things about Duke's MAternal Fetal Medicine and NICU. They are equiped with all the right things for preemies and high risk pregnancies.

I had very uneventful pregnancies with my other 2. I was really thrown off by preterm labour and premature babies. I was so thankful to be at UNC.

The first year is a blur (mostly due to the lack of sleep). My twins still tag team me at night. One was up 2-3:30 and the other 4-5:30. I keep them on the same feeding schedules, but you know how babies can be at night - sometimes they fall asleep easily, sometimes not! You will be tired! That is the hardest part to me, but it is all worth it.

Good luck with it. They really are a lot of fun.

Oh yeah - my twins are doing very well for being premature. they are almost 9 months (6 1/2 months adjusted) and do everything a 6-month old should do. They are happy and healthy too.

Hello! Congratulations on expecting twins! I had identical boys 19 weeks ago today :) They are our first children; I am 31 and have been married for almost 4 years. One of the few books I found was Twins! It was very helpful in educating me on development from gestation to 1 year. It also had discussions in the book with other parents of twins. Another book I found, along with a website, is The Baby Whisperer Solves All Your Problems by Tracy Hogg. The website is www.babywhisperer.com and there is a special forum for moms of multiples. You can ask all kinds of questions, and just talk about whatever you are experiencing. It's very trying at times with twins because you have to put one baby down to console the other, unlike with singletons. That was the hardest part for me, one crying and upset while I tried to calm the other. And one thing I cannot stress enough is SLEEP when they sleep. You hear this all the time, but it is definitely true with multiples. I didn't do this at first and I was exhausted. Tiredness and stress affect your milk supply, your mood and even their mood. If you have any other questions, please feel free to email me and I'll do what I can to help!
If you have freinds or family that want to help out, let them do cleaning/chores, play with your 6 year old or prep some meals for you. That is the biggest help you can get. That way you can SLEEP while the twins sleep. You won't really need much help with them because they are going to eat, sleep and poop for a while :) I breastfed my boys, and I still pump now that I am back at work. However, I did have to suplement some with formula. If you need to do the same, Mead Johnson (Enfamil) has a special program for Moms of multiples. Look on their website, or I can give you the info if you can't find it. Did I mention to SLEEP when they do???? :)

YEAY!!!! Best Wishes! You're going to do great. God always, always gives you what you can handle and learn from! I'm super excited for your family! You will get the best feedback from here! Just wanted to wish you all the best at this very exciting time!

No advice just congrats!!..
S. B

First of all, congratulations!
Second, I HAVE to recommend kellymom.com. I found it when I was pregnant and realized quickly it was the best online resource for moms. Then I found their forum section where the moms talk and that opened up a whole new world for me. Unlike most forums, this one is moderated by "experts" so the out-dated and harmful advice is filtered out. Well, not deleted, just not ignored. And corrected.

K.,

Take a long, thorough look at www.feingold.org if you want to prevent ADD, ADHD, allergies, excessive temper tantrums and want calmer, healthier children. Best wishes.

L. B.