How Do I Handle My 16 Yr Old Son

Updated on April 23, 2012
D.A. asks from Brandon, FL
6 answers

I went to the Police Dept this morning to report my son as a runaway. I informed them that he was in Lake Tahoe, CA. I gave them the address of where I believed he was at. within an hour the Police Dept and found him, now I have to drive all the way to Lake Tahoe and pick him up. I am very apprehensive on how this is going to be on the ride home and once I get him home what it is going to be like. Any suggestions?

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

So What Happened?

I want to thank everyone for your reponses. I am leaving today to go pick him up and will let you know the out come. This is not the first time that he has done this. He has been kicked out of three high schools for skipping classes and the last one for leaving campus and smoking pot with friends. the school that he is going to now is a school for kids that can't make it in the normal school setting. And he was actually getting very good grades and he is throwing this all away. I have explained to him the importance of getting his education and that without one he would not be able to find a good job. He keeps going to Lake Tahoe because this is where he met this girl last summer. Ever since he met her he does not want to go to school and says that he does not want to live here in our home town. He has become very combative and very ugly with me. This is his third time running away, and not going to school. It really takes its toll on you as a single parent.

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.K.

answers from Lafayette on

Well, do you know the reason he left? Are things going ok at home with him? I would stay as calm as possible and listen to him....

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.L.

answers from Savannah on

I just read your other post as well. I don't know your whole situation of course and I'm not saying your son is right in all of this. But maybe you could try being a little more sensitive. Like not calling his best friend a loser. I wouldn't like someone to talk about one of my friends like that (even if it is true, in your eyes). Or threatening to have him arrested. I mean, he probably would deserve it...but it sounds like maybe being a little more understanding of his perspective might help? Again I don't know the whole story but maybe just try to ask him questions about what he is thinking. Ask him what type of job does he expect to get with no education. Maybe show him the unemployment statistics and the amount of people without college degrees, let alone high school degrees, who cannot find work. I just mean, rather than name calling and threatening - try to show him actual reasons why you are so insistent on him finishing school. Explain to him that you are on his side and ask if you can help him with anything. Why doesn't he want to finish school and ask him if there's anything you can do to help him like it more. You're just trying to look out for him and give him the best so that he can have a good life. Good luck to you. My kids haven't reached the teenage years so I really don't have a clue but I'm just trying to think of how I would feel in that situation. I wish you the best....

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.T.

answers from Nashville on

He seem to runaway to this specific place all the time, because you knew exactly where he was. Your profile thing says Brandon Fl, how did he end up in Lake Tahoe, CA? Could something be there that keeps him going back to that place? Take some time to talk with him and see why he wants to runaway all the time.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.C.

answers from Houston on

If you have any problems with him on the way home....don't hestitate to call 911. Hopefully the two of you can have a heart to heart talk on the way home. Just feel him out...being mad and getting him upset won't help...just maybe saying nothing would be better....you will have to be the judge of that. Good Luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

In California, we have something called Job Corps. It's kind of a military style residential trade school type thing. The kids have to be at least 16 years old and have decent grades. Sounds like your son may meet those requirements.

I would see if there is something similar in your state and if so, tell sonny boy it's either straighten up or go to job corps. You may just want to sign him straight up. I doubt that he'll take you seriously if you warn/threaten him.
(Actually, I believe you are not actually in Florida if you are driving to Lake Tahoe and if your son could make it to Lake Tahoe from home.)

Also, let him know that his girl is not going to want anything to do with a high school drop out who won't even be able to afford to buy her dinner or take her out. If he truly likes her, he will want to get on a path that may lead to them being together - the one he's on now leads to nowhere.

Good luck. I know how trying the teen years can be. It's at this point that there is very little we as parents can do if our children rebel against us. It is very hard/heartbreaking to watch your child throw their future away. Been there, done that. So sorry that you are now there.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

Just wanted to wish you luck. Teenagers can be so difficult but not attending school should not be an option. Tell him if he doesn't go to school then he must work full time?

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions