Help Keeping Toddler in Toddler Bed!

L., I feel your pain! My first child did the same thing and it was awful! He was the same age and I had a six week old at the time. Long story about why we had to move him out of his crib but it won't help you to tell my story with that. I had to leave him in his room with the door closed and he would bang, take clothes out of his drawers and eventually fall asleep by the door. It was terrible but he had to work it out for himself. When he would wake up I would make him help me put all his clothes back in the drawers (not neat but it helped him understand)before we could leave. Eventually, he didn't want to do that anymore and he gave in to sleep,etc. It did take a few months (long months). I think this is a personality thing because he takes a long time with changes like this - you don't even want to know my potty training story with him. Talk about stubborn! You can try the gate thing too if it helps. We didn't but I know others who say it helped. Later on in the process, he wanted the door opened too and we said we would leave the door open if he didn't come out. That was effective in the later stages but not early on. Early on, I could not get engaged in the drama or I lost it and he seemed to be getting what he wanted - to see me and draw me in. Good luck and know that it isn't you. My second child transitioned to his big boy bed with no trouble. Whatever you do, stay consistent and find what works for your child.

Hello! Our first child did this. At first I would sit in the room and keep putting him in bed until he finally fell asleep. I got sick of doing that because it took forever and he kept thinking I was there to play with him. Finally we put up a gate and just ignored all of the yelling, etc. It took a while, but he finally would stop crying/yelling for us and fell asleep (sometimes on the floor and we would put him in his bed). Good luck!
A.
www.CareerAtHomeNow.net

I had something similar. What I would suggest is that, maybe your bedtime is way to early. My son is 2 years old. He is out by 10 o'clock, not 10:01, 10:02....10 on the dot! He sleeps until 7, sometimes 8:30!! But your daughter has to adjust. And as they get older, they will take you through something special. Keep a night light on at all times, cause what if she can't find the door. Its really a mental thing. Sleep in the room with her, not necessary in the same bed. If she thinks you are in the room, she will sleep soundly. I would crack the door a little, or put on some music so she will not wake up. Some kids are different, like my son he likes to her us moving around thats how he knows we are near! And that we have not went anywhere.....

Hi L. - we are going through this still with our almost 3 year old. (she'll be 3 in Dec) She just doesn't like to sleep. But, it isn't every day anymore...more like once a week. We bring her to bed now, sit on her bed and read a couple books, then leave the room, door cracked. She has a night light but also wants the lamp on too. We've done that and she has gotten much better. We just shut the light when we head up to bed...about 2 hours later. She's in bed by 8 and it is finally working out ok. Ask what she wants...maybe it's the light left on or door cracked. Try it... She doesn't like her door closed so we almost have to "threaten" if she gets out of bed, the door will be closed. It works. Good luck!

L. - You poor thing!! I have a 23 mos. old that we will be putting in a 'big kid bed' in about a week, so I definitely feel for you. I would suggest two things. One is leave the door open and put a gate up to keep her in her room. Also make sure any dangerous area's in the house are gated off (steps etc.). Maybe she really is just scared & confused. They used to sell bed tents for twin/full size beds (don't know if they still do?), but this could be an option if she likes being in tents. The tent just fits over the bed. I would definitely NOT put her back in the crib, as the crib tents can be expensive & she will have to move eventually. You could also try hanging out longer in her room in her bed. Reading stories, just trying to get her used to the new bed. Good luck to you, my daughter is a real stubborn one too, so I can relate! :) She'll get the idea, hang in there!

Hi L.,

I also had the same problem with my son, when he transitioned into a toddler bed. I would leave his door open and put a gate in the doorway. That way, I could check from time to time. At the beginning he would fall asleep by the gate, blankie and stuffed "lovie" and all...I would carry him back to his bed. I think this lasted about a week (although it seemed, at the time, like longer) and that seemed to help for awhile. Now, he's 4 1/2 and scared of the dark. We're trying a sticker chart, with a reward, for staying in his bed.

Hope this helps!
Good luck!

We just went through this with our son. The first night, I was on duty. We had two hours of walking him back to bed, no talking and no emotion. I needed a serious break so my husband stepped in and took over. Within 10 minutes he was staying in bed and went to sleep.

Since he stayed in bed for daddy, he put him to bed for the rest of the week. We had few problems - he got up maybe once or twice but went back to bed. After 4 days of daddy putting him to bed and standing guard, we decided that I ought to try again on day #5. We went through our routine and put him down, but he kept popping out again, so daddy took over (this time after only 30 minutes). No more return trips after daddy took over.

We learned that he'd stay in bed for daddy but not for mommy so we decided to "pull a fast one". The next night (day #6), I did the whole night time routine and put him into bed BUT my husband stood guard. Of course he popped right out of bed again, but after my husband put him back he only got out one more time and then went to sleep. He probably thinks that, even though mommy is putting him to bed, daddy is the one standing guard so he doesn't get out. From day #7-#14, we alternated putting him to bed but having daddy stand guard. He rarely got out of bed. On day #15 dad stopped standing guard and it's been problem-free.

For us, it was important to maintain consistency in how we put him back to bed. No talking, no eye contact, and nothing that would make it 'fun' or 'attention grabbing' for our son. He soon learned that he wasn't missing out on anything and that, when it is bedtime, both of his parents become rather boring thus it wasn't worth his time or energy to get out of bed.